Recently, I was on a walk enjoying a podcast and I had to stop and take notes because what was shared was so powerful.
Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory were discussing a very common, but unhealthy way of living.
Listen to this super short video (less than 2 minutes) for the more.
You have an opportunity to win a free paperback copy of Kathi and Cheri’s book You Don’t Have to Try So Hard: Ditch Expectations and Live Your Own Best Life.
To enter the drawing, just leave a comment below sharing one area of your life that you tend to try too hard .
l will randomly draw one name on Wednesday October 10 (winner will be notified by email then mailed to continental U.S. only).
I strongly resist being measured by the expectations of others, and work hard to not have high expectations, and in that way, everything is serendipitous.
Earlier this week, my precious wife texted me something along the lines of “I hope I make you happy.” I thought “That’s not your job!”
No one of us can “make” someone else happy, and if that’s what I am expecting of her, I am being borderline abusive in that. That’s too much pressure for any one person to carry, and it would be unfair of me to lay that burden on her.
Be free!
Damon, thanks for sharing and that’s so wonderful that you know it’s not your wife’s job to “make you happy”.
I try very hard at everything I do. I don’t think things come easy for me. Maybe I’m not smart enough. I don’t know what the problem is. I did excellent in school, but had to
work very hard at studying every night and weekends. This has been my life and is still my life now. I am 71 years old and I struggle. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. I have a hard time making decisions and sorting things out.
Hi Rita, thank you for connecting and being real about your struggle. So many people share this struggle. There are so many things that you could do (and you’ve probably tried many of them), but one thing that can be helpful is to talk to someone who knows how to help people get unstuck. I find that helpful for me.
How can I find someone who totally understands this problem and can help me? I’m feeling desperate. I am so very stuck.
Hi Rita, there is help. I’ve received help and so have many others when they’ve been stuck by working with a therapist or life coach. This does take an investment of time and money, but it’s so worth it.
Thanks for sharing this video, Mary Lou. I try too hard to stay in touch with too many people. It’s hard to say “No” when my heart cares. Yet, I know that I can’t say and effective “Yes” to everyone. Only God can do that.
Jane, your heart does care so well and I am so happy to read that you are seeing how saying the effective “yes” and knowing that God is taking care of the details.
This was so timely for me Mary Lou! I just had a conversation with my hubby about this last night. I carry that responsibility with my immediate family a lot and it has recently come to my attention. I tend to sacrifice my values and happiness with the goal of what I THINK will make my family happier or to meet
whatever expectations I’ve conjured up that they may have for me. It’s EXHAUSTING. Definitely looking to make a change in this area. Getting freedom from this gives me hope to move forward. Thanks again!
Andi, this is so wonderful. I relate to this. Thank you for sharing.
This looks amazing! I try too hard to please others and in the process, I’ve lost myself.
So many relate to what you are sharing Katrina, thanks for connecting.
I grew up thinking I was responsible for a parent’s unhappiness. Whenever anyone in my household struggles, the burden to make it all better SO OFTEN overwhelms. My countenance tends to rise and fall with theirs. Vicarious happiness, sadness, loneliness, depression…
Oh Lisa, so many of us relate to that with how we feel around people with emotional struggles. Thanks for connecting.
What a great reminder that’s it’s not all up to me! It’s an important lesson I need to remember more often!
Rhonda, I need that reminder more often than I would like to admit, thanks for connecting.
Mary Lou,
I feel like I should have done moe than staying home and raising my kids. They are grown and I’m still a homemaker. Society makes it seem as you are nothing if you are not a career woman.
Hi Julie, what a blessing that you were able to stay home. Thanks for connecting.
Mary Lou, I loved seeing your video. A sweet smile and spirit to match!
For me, I suppose trying to make up for the mom I was before I came to know Christ — not that I was perfect afterward, but my shift in purpose drastically changed everything. {Thank You, Lord!}
Cathy, thank you for your kind encouragement. Reading your story is interesting, thank you.
Thank you for giving us a chance to win.
You’re welcome Noelle, thanks for connecting.
This is the focus for me in Celebrate Recovery. I tend to put others’ needs at the forefront and neglect my own. Reading this should help with that.
Celebrate Recovery is such a great place to work on that and yes, the book should help too, thanks for sharing Debbie.
I tend to try too hard at parenting. Homeschooling 3 teenagers is getting to me.
What a time of life you are in Mellissa, thanks for connecting.
I overfunction in a few areas but the one I’ve been working on with the most focus is motherhood. There was a time I defined being a good mom as having no boxed anything in my house with everything organic and made from scratch — including our food, hygiene products and cleaning supplies. But that wasn’t enough. I thought my girls needed a full schedule of playdates, learning toys, interactive games and enrichment activities. Once I realized that perfect was only for Pinterest, I found myself enjoying motherhood much more even when I wasn’t meeting my own expectations.
Tonya, thank you so much for sharing so well what so many Moms relate to (me included).